travel

just jolly in johannesburg

Johannesburg is a city in a parallel universe, where income disparity and crime go hand in hand with booming economies and flowering hope. A sprawling metro area of over 5 million undulates between burgeoning slums and suburban perfection, often within a five minute driving distance.  All this lends a unique air to the city, where adventures of all sorts mix with the rythym of the everyday. 

arrival
In Melville are a rapidly expanding number of boutique guesthouses. A fun option is Tama Rumah, which features a friendly and personalized environment with spacious rooms and nice smiling ladies every who prepare a hearty breakfast to enjoy in bouganveilla covered gardens. Ask for Melanie to angle for the best rooms in the back garden.
Tama Rumah Guest House
88 4th Avenue, Melville 
Johannesburg, Gauteng, South Africa
Contact: Melanie
Local Tel: 011-4827611
INT Tel: +27-11-4827611

activities
Modern people are conditioned to see the world as a friendly place. Everybody likes malls and museums, café culture and burlesque bars all delivered on a google map with a social tracer to shadow friends as we walk down the street. In Johannesburg the malls are just as likely to get torched in a botched robbery, so it might be wise to have a think about the sources of such discomfort. 

To help you do that, spend a day on a walking tour of Soweto with Cedric de la Harpe, the “white zulu”, who understands the damage both apartheid and poverty have inflicted on the majority of South Africa’s black population. 

Cedric spent a number of years working on sports development programs to assist youth in the townships and knows Soweto intimately, walking it barefoot daily. He is chums with many of Mandela’s old friends, and will show you a side of South Africa few visitors get to see. Being a barefoot Zulu isn’t easy, so he can be a bit hard to reach — go through Paula to track him down. If you’re not into the malls (Sandton City is the largest mall in the southern hemisphere and a main pursuit of Johannesburg evenings) try having a wander along Melville’s main drag to see antique shops and other shopping attractions in a more authentic atmosphere. This is also ground zero for the best bars in the city, but it only takes about one night to feel like you’ve been there, done that. A more worthwhile pursuit is the three-hour drive north of Johannesburg to the Pilanesburg, a decent sized nature reserve featuring abundant rhinos, elephants, giraffe, zebra, impala and the occasional lion. A day trip is almost enough, but we recommend you camp out overnight in fixed tents to be up at the crack of dawn to go on a game drive. All in, its one of the easiest and fastest ways to see the African bush in all its glory.

food
Wine in South Africa is famously amazing, and the food can also be delicious. Aside from local delicacies such as impala, kuzu, ostrich and crocodile, which show up regularly on menus (is that wrong?), there is a wide selection of good restaurants. For meat lovers, try Steers, the Butcher Shop and Mandela Square and the Meat Company in FourWays, all of which offer a great selection of exotic, meaty fare. For more traditional African, try the March restaurant in the Melrose Arch Hotel, Melrose Arch. A beautiful swimming pool and casual atmosphere also make this a great spot for a lazy Sunday and a long brunch. The Coachman’s Inn was opened by Nick Nicola many years ago and remains family owned, and a local favorite. An eclectic décor and outstanding food are the hallmarks of the restaurant.

Coachman’s Inn
29 Peter Place
Johannesburg 2060, South Africa
INT Tel: +27 11 706 7269

Johannesburg is a study of contrasts, and as the richest business center in Southern Africa, deserves its place of honor as a world city. 

However, its sprawling size, social disparity and lack of world-class entertainment contribute to a fortress style personality, where the prevailing view is “what’s mine is mine, and gated.” That said, no city is happier to have a visitor than Johannesburg, and everyone will bend over backwards to make you feel safe, comfortable and welcome. They will drive for miles to show you a good time and whisk you back before midnight for an early start the next day. The sad thing is that it feels like you have to, because “if you stop at night in the dark, you might get carjacked,” they say, laughing, with not as much sarcasm as one would like.  But really, its fine! And it is really quite safe! Unless you’re an impala, in which case all bets are off.

Stan Stalnaker is the founder and creative director of Hub Culture Ltd., a movement with a suite of activities focused on content development, private social networks and global experiences. He can be contacted at stan.stalnaker@hubculture.com.